Ever get that feeling of epiphany? When you suddenly realized something? Something you discovered or a potential solution to your problem that left you saying AHA! Yes? Then you’re in the “Eureka Zone”!
A few years back, on an evening like any other, I had a sudden realization: I felt I was in danger of wasting my life. As I stared out the rain-spattered window of a Manila to Laguna Bus, I saw that the years were slowly turning like a page of the book wanting to reach the end.
What do I really want in life? I asked myself while staring at the cold window of the bus looking at people closing their shops and children running home to escape the heavy rains. Fairly simple, my answer is I want to be happy of course. Well I had plenty of reasons to be happy: My family is complete, healthy and getting by, though we are not rich, I can say that we do count our blessings and grateful for everything that we have. I had a handful of trusted friends; I had a girlfriend to rely on and kept me sane during tough times and amazingly she could absorb nearly every rant I threw because I lose my temper quite easily. But hey, really, is this how a happy human behave?
Apparently I jot down some of the things that really matters when it comes to pursuing your happiness. Well, at least for me.
i] One does not simply dwell into petty things. I used to let petty things bother me; it kind of pisses me off when people are talking rude behind your back. Either say it straight to my face or do not talk at all! Momentarily I just got to the point where I just did not care anymore; I could just blow it off. Now I do my best to ignore things that really do not matter and it works for me.
ii] Face your fears. You’ll never know unless you try. I suppose being afraid to talk about your fears is one of the worst fears of all, because to confess your fears is really to expose your innermost self; the part you hide from everybody and even those dearest to you! In fact, the part you’re even trying to hide from yourself, because you’re afraid to think about it. You don’t even want to confess it to yourself that you’re afraid because that would be admitting you’re a coward, and you don’t want to confess you’re a coward for fear of being exposed prior to rejection. Yes that’s the word REJECTION; you are daunted that you will be rejected. One solution I considered is to face your fears and to acknowledge them; even confess them, but to take a positive stand against them of course. In life we all have this skeletons in the closet (mine is under the bed though ), that we must take care of. It really pays to face your fears and be responsible; recognize they’re there, decide and learn to let it go. Any kind of fear must never let you control your life.
iii] Do NOT let the sun go down on anger or just LET it? Okay so this one might be a little confusing. We all heard that we must let go of any anger we endured before ending the day right? Think about yourself: there is probably never a day in your personal life when you aren’t angry in some way. The crucial question is, “Are you good and angry at the same time?” But a certain individual could only carry so much. Look into your heart and humbly ask yourself this question: How much of my daily anger has anything at all to do with the happiness that I’m seeking? You could either express the anger regardless how minor or major it is then amplify bad feelings at the end of the day, or just let it, let it dissipate and it could result to your inner peace or just aggravate the depression even more.
iv] Get out of your Comfort Zone. Challenge and seeking new interests are key elements of happiness. This also means learning new ideas: it could be a new game or go somewhere you’ve never been to. An unfamiliar feeling gives me creeps at first, but without it I will never experience something new. Happiest people often seek adventures that could change their life and give more exciting elements while they’re at it.
v] Happiness for sale. They say you can’t buy happiness. I say it depends on the person. I’m a tech savvy and I love gadgets. Material happiness is like if you’re in the sea swimming in the shallowest depths. You still feel the ambience of the sea and you’re okay with that not taking the scuba thingies to dive deeper. Although it might be a temporary happiness, it still amuses you and you get this warm fuzzy feeling of acquiring things you desire.
vi] Listen to people around you. We are social beings. We connect with each other by means of socializing. This generally means that we have to consider other people’s opinions and thoughts then weigh it accordingly. We don’t want to hear the phrase “Cheers to the best advice you didn’t take!”
I want to know things that really matters, I want to live life to the fullest. All these clichés really makes sense to me as I got off the bus that night. As I stare to people trying to live and get by each day, they smile because they are resilient, because tomorrow is another day, another chance to make it right. They already know life is hitting them and they gladly embraced it hoping that one day it’ll all be worth it.
Alas! Cheers to this Eureka! And for two cents worth: “If you’re unhappy or anxious, it’s a sign that your thoughts aren’t serving you and you’re focusing on what you DON’T want. To shift your energy, simply change your focus to what you WANT instead.”